Staff

You may have heard that dogs have masters (or owners) but cats have staff.

It is true.

This is most evident to me in the matter of snacks. (I may have told you this before, and if so, I apologize. As is often the case with these old established households, loyal old family retainers such as I are often kept on for sentimental reasons, even after we are no longer as sharp as we once were.)

The cats, hereinafter The Family, have a bowl of healthy dry cat food that is kept amply supplied and always accessible to them at all times. It is placed conveniently between the wall and the buffet between the staff dining room and the library. This is kept filled and The Family can and do make use of it whenever they wish. They prefer that it be filled to overflowing, but in an emergency will eat from it when it is only full.

In addition to this supply of nourishment, the staff are expected to supply snacks -- Greenies, to be specific, which the staff think are meant to clean the teeth of The Family. That may be, but The Family prefer to think of the snacks as tasty acts of submission on the part of the staff. Greenies in appropriate servings are provided when the staff rises in the morning and several times during the day to make sure they, the staff, toe the line. When they are lax in their duties, The Family track them down and remind them.

What amuses this staff member about the snacks is the following. When The Family insist on a snack between what the staff meeting has agreed are the appropriate times,  I have discovered that I can give The Family anything by hand and they will eat it and be happy. This is true even if, with The Family hot on my heels and closely observing what I am about, I take a few pieces of their regular food out of the pitcher in which it is stored and put those bits on the floor. The Family will wait for me to put the faux snacks out and immediately gobble them up -- all the while ignoring the bowl full of the very same stuff which is located a few inches from where I am offering the fraudulent snack.

This convinces me that the real treat is not the Greenies or the other snacks -- it is having a member of the human staff wait on The Family by hand, thus establishing the power structure clearly once again.

Now if you will excuse me, I hear The Family coming down the stairs and I need to look busy.