Friday, July 4, 2014

A little humor for the Fourth



The coming of Independence Day means fireworks season — and the beginning of the institutionalized charade behind their sale in Florida.

In the Sunshine State, one does not buy a bottle rocket for recreation; one buys it to scare birds away from farms and fisheries.

That’s right: Explosives for pest control.

Technically speaking, consumer fireworks are illegal in Florida. But nearly 60 years ago, state lawmakers passed an exception — now the only one of its kind in the United States — for fireworks purchases by farms and fish hatcheries.

That’s how vendors, including those in the ubiquitous tents that spring up along Florida roadsides, have gotten around the general fireworks prohibition for years. They simply ask customers to sign forms saying they’re buying under an agricultural or other exemption. There’s also one for illuminating a stretch of railroad.

The Division of State Fire Marshal prepares a guide for fireworks inspections, and enforcement is left to spot-checking by local police and fire agencies. The state’s courts, however, have said that sellers aren’t required to make sure a fireworks customer really needs to light up a railway or chase off geese.

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