In April 2000, a mother named Sharon Underwood from White River Junction,
Vermont wrote
one of the most heartfelt and pointed letters to the editor that the Valley News has probably ever received. In
the letter, she expressed her righteous anger at the local do-gooders whose
moralism had for years inflicted pain and torment on her young gay son. That
letter is still prescient today. Even now, it tells the story of thousands of
LGBT youth trapped in communities where they still aren’t welcome.
Here is that letter, reprinted in full:
Many letters have been sent to the
Valley News concerning the homosexual menace in Vermont. I am the mother of a gay son and
I’ve taken enough from you good people.
I’m tired of your foolish rhetoric
about the “homosexual agenda” and your allegations that accepting homosexuality
is the same thing as advocating sex with children. You are cruel and ignorant.
You have been robbing me of the joys of motherhood ever since my children were
tiny.
My firstborn son started suffering at
the hands of the moral little thugs from your moral, upright families from the
time he was in the first grade. He was physically and verbally abused from
first grade straight through high school because he was perceived to be gay.
He never professed to be gay or had
any association with anything gay, but he had the misfortune not to walk or
have gestures like the other boys. He was called “fag” incessantly, starting
when he was 6.
In high school, while your children
were doing what kids that age should be doing, mine labored over a suicide
note, drafting and redrafting it to be sure his family knew how much he loved
them. My sobbing 17-year-old tore the heart out of me as he choked out that he
just couldn’t bear to continue living any longer, that he didn’t want to be gay
and that he couldn’t face a life without dignity.
You have the audacity to talk about
protecting families and children from the homosexual menace, while you
yourselves tear apart families and drive children to despair. I don’t know why
my son is gay, but I do know that God didn’t put him, and millions like him, on
this Earth to give you someone to abuse. God gave you brains so that you could
think, and it’s about time you started doing that.
At the core of all your misguided
beliefs is the belief that this could never happen to you, that there is some
kind of subculture out there that people have chosen to join. The fact is that
if it can happen to my family, it can happen to yours, and you won’t get to
choose. Whether it is genetic or whether something occurs during a critical
time of fetal development, I don’t know. I can only tell you with an absolute
certainty that it is inborn.
If you want to tout your own
morality, you’d best come up with something more substantive than your
heterosexuality. You did nothing to earn it; it was given to you. If you
disagree, I would be interested in hearing your story, because my own
heterosexuality was a blessing I received with no effort whatsoever on my part.
It is so woven into the very soul of me that nothing could ever change it. For
those of you who reduce sexual orientation to a simple choice, a character
issue, a bad habit or something that can be changed by a 10-step program, I’m
puzzled. Are you saying that your own sexual orientation is nothing more than
something you have chosen, that you could change it at will? If that’s not the
case, then why would you suggest that someone else can?
A popular theme in your letters is
that Vermont
has been infiltrated by outsiders. Both sides of my family have lived in Vermont for generations.
I am heart and soul a Vermonter, so I’ll thank you to stop saying that you are
speaking for “true Vermonters.”
You invoke the memory of the brave
people who have fought on the battlefield for this great country, saying that
they didn’t give their lives so that the “homosexual agenda” could tear down
the principles they died defending. My 83-year-old father fought in some of the
most horrific battles of World War II, was wounded and awarded the Purple
Heart.
He shakes his head in sadness at the
life his grandson has had to live. He says he fought alongside homosexuals in
those battles, that they did their part and bothered no one. One of his best
friends in the service was gay, and he never knew it until the end, and when he
did find out, it mattered not at all. That wasn’t the measure of the man.
You religious folk just can’t bear
the thought that as my son emerges from the hell that was his childhood he
might like to find a lifelong companion and have a measure of happiness. It
offends your sensibilities that he should request the right to visit that
companion in the hospital, to make medical decisions for him or to benefit from
tax laws governing inheritance.
How dare he? you say. These
outrageous requests would threaten the very existence of your family, would
undermine the sanctity of marriage.
You use religion to abdicate your
responsibility to be thinking human beings. There are vast numbers of religious
people who find your attitudes repugnant. God is not for the privileged
majority, and God knows my son has committed no sin.
The deep-thinking author of a letter
to the April 12 Valley News who lectures about homosexual sin and tells us
about “those of us who have been blessed with the benefits of a religious
upbringing” asks: “What ever happened to the idea of striving . . . to be
better human beings than we are?”
Indeed, sir, what ever happened to
that?
Source: View From Here
1 comment:
Beautifully written and from the heart...truth abounds.
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